Lost, Alias, and CSI:NY Recaps

If you didn't watch these yesterday and don't want to know what happend, obviously don't read down. Pretty self-explanatory. But why weren't you watching them? They're three of the best shows on televison, two of which have been picked up for another season (thank you, ABC!!!), and you should definately be watching. Don't give me a silly excuse like homework, I had it too and I managed to watch!!! Moving on...

NOTE:This is going to be kind of a long one, because there were three shows and two new ones, but I promise it's interesting!!!!

I kind of half-watched "Lost" last night because there was only one TV that wasn't in use, and it was upstairs, and I had to eat. So I kind of missed the beginning, but I don't think it was anything drastic. First of all, this show is getting kind of strange. My bio professor and I were discussing this yesterday (and I pay for this education?) and the whole "glowing space-ship-like hatch" and Blessed Virgin dolls are freaking us out. And does the beginning seem Hitchcockian to anybody? You know, the whole "Lost" thing floating around in darkness with eerie noise in the background? It looks like "Charade" or some movie like that. And I don't think the writers know where they're going anymore. In the beginning it seemed like they had a plot kind of worked out, you know, with the whole pilot-being-sucked-out-of-the-engine thing, but now it's just kind of confusing. ABC has promised that the storyline with Kate and the little plane and one other one (I forget which) will definately be cleared up by the season finale. But you can bet they'll have another cliff-hanger for us that will plauge me for three months while I'm already dealing with the ungodly hot climate I live in...and I'm rambling. I'm just suggesting that the writers rein in the stories a little bit. Moving on to the actual episode...

It opened (I think) with Jack giving Boone a tranfusion of his own (Jack's) blood. I guess somebody on the plane had a blood-typing kit in their luggage, because otherwise this would have been somewhat dangerous. Whatever. Boone's not doing well, and apparently blood is pooling in his leg (probably because of the antibodies attacking Jack's blood. Didn't the writers take a biology course?) Not good. So Jack is faced with the difficult decision of whether to cut off the leg or not. And, for some reason I didn't catch, the Korean woman is with him and (I think) trying to convince him to leave the leg on.

Meanwhile, elsewhere on the island, Claire, Kate, Charlie, and the Korean woman's husband are walking around (also for no apparent reason) and Claire's water breaks. Again, not good. Although I don't know why they're all so darn surprised, she's been eight months pregnant since like October. Charlie, being the attentive sorta-boyfriend, runs off to find Jack. But wait- Jack is busy! Kate must deliver the baby! And Claire must freak out about the baby not loving her because she wanted to give it up for adoption. Kate, who I never saw as having many maternal insticts (maybe because she's spent most of the season skinny-dipping with Sawyer...ew.) gets Claire through her momentary psychosis and delivers the "baby" (at least four months old) and even the Korean dude who beats his wife cracks a smile. Awww!!!!

Somewhere else on the island (how big is this thing?) Shannon and Sayid are making out next to a fire. Don't know how they got there (last week they were "friends"), or how her white tank top stayed so remarkably clean with all the sand, or who started the fire, because they're both pretty much incompentant except he knows how to torture and she can sing in French, but they're there. (By the way, if you ever want to look at Sayid the same way again, don't watch The English Patient. Ew.) I guess Shannon drops the bomb about Boone, and Sayid is surprisingly okay with the fact that the woman he was just kissing has also kissed her brother, but whatever. Maybe the Iraqi sun makes you crazy. Then Shannon says something about not rushing their relationship and Sayid says something about having no expectations. Uh-huh. You're a perfect gentleman, Sayid. *rolls eyes*

Back with Jack and Boone, Jack knows something must be done. *dramtic pause* He decides to cut off Boone's leg- "It's dead" he proclaims. How is a leg dead? A leg is not a living being. The person can be dead, and/or the leg can not serve any function except festering and being a risk for blood clots, but a leg can not be dead. Somebody has got to enroll the writers in Biology 101. Grrr. I guess Boone comes to for a second before Jack starts chopping, because he whispers "Locke" which I'm sure will serve some significance later on in the show *wink wink*. So Jack starts chopping, and the Korean woman looks away, and I'm pretty sure the leg comes of (to be honest, I changed the chanel because I was eating at the time.). But alas, all of Jack's work does not pay off, and Boone dies. Sadness. Unless they're just doing another hallucinogenic drug thing where Locke drugged Jack and we only think he's dead. Hmmm. I doubt they'd trot that out again, though.

About the time this is all happening, the whole baby-posse comes out of the woods with a clean pink baby (how they cleaned it up in the forest? Don't know.) Awww- baby! Everybody oohhs and ahhs over the kid, including Sawyer who may not have a solid stone heart as previously expected. Hmmm. Then the fat guy taps on Jack's shoulder (Jack, by the way, has not seen fit to mention to anyone that Boone has died) and points over to the beach, where Shannon and Sayid are coming back holidng hands and giggling. Ever watched a former Iraqi operative giggle? Nasty. Sad music starts to play as we see Jack tell Shannon about her brother-slash-lover's death while she was rolling around in the sand with Sayid. Shannon is upset, evident by the brilliant crying she does at the end. Boy, that kid's acting school really paid off!!! All kidding aside, it was a really good episode.

Alias was also kind of confusing (actually, I haven't been able to understand it in three years). Apparently, Vaughn's dad was liquified in some sort of Russian torture chamber and now Vaughn needs to find out about this. Why did he wait until he's like thirty-five to do this? Don't know. But we do know that Russians and Germans and pretty much anybody from east of France is Very Bad. This the writers are sure about. They must be watching old tapes of CNN or something, because they haven't gotten the memo that the Cold War has been over for like fifteen years and not all of our villains have to be of eastern-European background. But whatever. It's fun to watch Vaughn speak Russian.

So Vaughn goes to his faithful and slighly thick girlfriend, Sydney, and gets her to help him by keeping this a secret while he figures out what to do. Sydney, however, goes running to Daddy and gets him to give her access to secret spy computor systems. Somehow they have this one word, "nightengale", that's related to Vaughn's dad's death, so Sydney does a little Google search and comes up with a program run-where else?- in Siberia by guys who speak German. Long story short, Vaughn gets upset that Sydney squealed to Daddy, Sydney assures Vaughn that Daddy will keep this a secret (it's not like he's every done anything to betray her trust like, oh, KILL HER MOTHER!!!!), Vaughn stops sniveling and he and Sydney go to Germany where Sydney gets to wear a barmaids uniform and almost kiss a gross old German dude but then kick his ass and get him to give her his computor. In the space of about five seconds. That Sydney can move quickly in fishnets and a short skirt!!! Daddy must be so proud! So Sydney and Vaughn return to the US, where nobody seems to care that they used the forbidden Google search and then went rogue.

But things are not so simple!! See, Daddy has been spilling all this to Sloane (creepy ex-terrorist who had an affair with Mommy). No, Daddy, no!!! It appears that they planned this so Sydney and Vaughn could go traisping all over the former Soviet block and risk their lives so that Sloane and Daddy could stay hom in their cool modern offices with so much glass you wonder what kind of secrets they can keep if they can all see into each other's spaces!!! What, Daddy not immediately think of Sydney's good first? Shocking!

And some weird guy (weird because he has an American and not Russian accent) is calling Vaughn and then drugging him and then telling him that he has information about his father. But he wants this coil thingy first. Well, back Sydney and Vaughn go to Siberia---this time with Daddy in tow for no apparently reason other than that the script required him to be there. They come upon the Russian Torture Chamber that the viewers remember from the beginning of the episode. Right here, you know something is going to go wrong. Of course, Sydney must rush into the chamber to get the coil, and lets the door slam shut behind her or something equally implausible. Meanwhile, Vaughn is doing something with the computor, and Daddy is shooting some Russian guy in the leg because he won't tell him where Yelena Derevkov is. (BTW, if somebody would like to tell me who the heck Yelena Derevkov is, I'd appreciate it!)

So Sydney is stuck in the liquifying room, and there's a countdown of sixty seconds, that somehow takes closer to five minutes to actually conclude. Sydney doesn't know she's about to be liquified, but she does, being so perceptive, know that something bad is going to happen. So she freaks out, and Vaughn does something with the outlet, and Marshall tries to do something with the computor from way back in the US, and Daddy finally hauls off and kills Russian Scientist dude because it's clear he's not going to tell him where this Yelena person is. Instantly switching from cold CIA dude to warm and cuddly dad-mode, Daddy rushs into a radioactive thing to stop the power to the chamber that Sydney is stuck in, saving his daughters life. Awww!!! Vaughn then hits Sydney in the face and takes the coil to go meet the bad American dude, allowing Sydney to go running to Jack going "Daddy, he beat me up and took the coil!!! P.S. I am totally not at fault nor did I know anything about the fact that my boyfriend has just gone rogue." They have a touching Father-Daughter moment where Daddy totally knows what's going on. See? That's why he has level-six clearance!

The episode ended with Daddy feeling kind of woozy from his little trip into the radioactive room, and I'm sure we're going to hear more about his in the future. Yay! Oooh, and ABC announced last week that they rehired Lena Olin to play Sydney's mom---even though she's dead. Hmmm. Must keep watching!!!!!

CSI:NY was a rerun---and not even a very good one. It's the circus thing again. I hate that one. You don't even see enough of Flack in it. And there's nothing about how sweet Mac is- or how obviously Aiden and Danny are meant to be together. And really, the Romeo and Juliet analogy has been done to death. Grrr. At least next week is a new episode. Happiness!!! By the way, when is CBS going to start living up to their promise that this edition is more about the personal relationships between the little CSI people? There hasn't been one romance yet!!! I mean, Mac took Stella to the dog show once, but that was just because he was finishing a case there. (Also, if you're making upwards of ninety-eight thousand dollars a year, you can take the girl someplace where you don't have to walk over dog poop to get to your seats. Come on, Mac.)

I'll post later tonight or tomorrow with stuff about tonight's Joey, Will and Grace, CSI: Original, and ER. Possibly a little Apprentice as well!!!