I actually had this entire review written out and finished and then blogger.com decided to have some maintenence time. Bugger. So I lost everything. As a result, I think this might be somewhat shorter, because I also want to finish the CSI: Miami entry from a couple of weeks ago, and also do one from last night. So, with that in mind, on with the show...
This was a very complicated episode. There were two story lines, but the first one is the biggest and probably has the most repercussions for the rest of the season, so I'll start with this one. Danny and some other guy were in an apartment or something, and then Danny ended up chasing the guy to the subway before shooting and killing the guy. Except the guy that ends up dead turns out to be a cop. Oooh. Right there you know there's going to be issues.
Author's Note: I missed the first five minutes due to the fact that i was watching Alias. ABC really needs to learn to keep their shows ending on time. So I kind of just pieced together the beginning. I am sure that they were in a subway, and that the cop was dead. Anyhoodle...
So of course, the IAB (Internal Affairs Bureau) just has to get involved. And of course, the IAB guys are big and scary and clearly corrupt. And, of course, Danny has to go shooting off his mouth and tell the IAB guys everything, despite the fact that Mac so clearly and fatherly warned him to just stay quiet for awhile, because he didn't actually have to give a statement for thirty-six hours or some arbitrary rule or something.
Danny, why do you do this??? Come on, man- you've got mob ties and a shifty beard and then you go tell the IAB stuff that would just be better left unsaid. Listen to Mac!! He was a Marine, dammit, and was looking out for you, and is clearly smarter because he doesn't spend his entire work day flirting with Aiden, thank God, because that would just be weird, and was just looking out for your best interest!!! So just listen to Mac and SHUT UP already!!!! Because if you get fired, the writers are going to have to have Flack drool over Collegan Lips to give the public the romance they're all clamoring for (or they think they're clamoring for) and that would devestate me. Sheesh.
Back to our story, Danny maintains (while giving an unauthorized-by-Mac statement to the IAB...idiot) that the cop, who was undercover, never identified himself, and was standing right where the bad guy was, so he was almost justified in shooting him. Well, the CSI's go back to their handy little audio tape (because, really, every crime is caught on tape, right?), and find out that Danny isn't telling the right story. The officer did identify himself, right before Danny fired the last two fatal shots. Bummer. Of course, Danny has already opened up that big piehole of his, so the IAB has him down as a liar. Big bummer.
Yeah, this story doesn't actually get resolved, because Danny really did kill the guy, and he's going to have to live with that. It ends with a pissed-off Mac telling a dejected-looking Danny that he really shouldn't have hired him in the first place, and that he was off the promotion list, which doesn't seem quite so bad to me, unless Danny to aspires to pull down the 98k that Stella and Mac do. Which I totally would want if I had to deal with blood and gore all day. Anyway, I think this was part of their attempt to bring the stories around to more character-driven stories as oppsed to neat little crimes that are tied up in forty-six minutes.
The other crime was pretty small- a foreign, probably illegal, nanny was found dead in a bathroom in a park. (See, never use public bathrooms!!!) Stella has to work this one alone, because everybody else is combing the entire subway system trying to clear Danny while he's off giving imprudent interviews. It actually gets wrapped up pretty quickly- the nanny's other nanny friends created a little theft ring and when Dead Nanny wanted out, Indian Nanny killed her. Which is rather implausible, because Indian Nanny was like shorter than me (and that's hard to do), and weighed ninety five pounds and how she could take down a five-eight normal-sized (well, for CSI anyway- she was probably a four or something obscene like that. Hate skinny people.) woman I don't really understand. But that's not really the issue.
Continuing with the whole "CSI's are real people" theory, Stella has to take the baby that Dead Nanny was caring for and make sure she's okay. Well, this is the most adorable little baby girl you've ever seen. Even cuter than the one on CSI: Miami a couple of weeks ago. And it has loser parents who haven't shown up yet, which is pretty much par for the course as far as CSI goes- all the parents are losers.
And while Stella is examining the baby, Daniella, you can practically hear her biological clock ticking. In fact, I'm guessing that she left social services, went back to her apartment, and cried over her Lean Cuisine about how she and Mac should have several kids by now.
See? Stella and Mac have got to get together!!! Stella is clearly has maternal instincts, because she practically smuggled poor little abandoned Daniella out of social services, and Mac needs something more than a beachball to love, and WHY DON'T THSE CSI WOMEN EVER LISTEN TO ME WHEN I TELL THEM WHO THEY SHOULD BE WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY???????????????? Grrr. This is what the public wants, not Danny and Aiden trading cute little bondage jokes over dinner. Bruckheimer had better clear this up or I'll have to retract my offer to give him my first born. Argh.
Anyhoo, I simply must say something about Flack in this episode (hence the title). He was superb. And he tackles a guy. Like against a wall. In a hot trench coat. With that cute little Brooklyn accent. *thud* Is it hot in here??? You know, they really need to give him more airtime. Maybe with Danny "off the promotion list" or whatever, that'll happen finally!!! In fact, I think we should just have a CSI: Flack. Hmm? He could just tackle guys and interrogate rapists (like that really hot Christmas episode that I still have on tape...I'm odd...)...oooh, maybe he could be sensitive like Ryan and Stella and take care on a little abandoned baby!!! That would be sweet!!!! I'm going to go have happy fantasies in my head... ;)
New episodes of all my shows tonight, so I'll there will be a ton of stuff up today and tomorrow!!!
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1 comment:
It's a Bronx accent, and it wasn't a really hot trenchcoat, it was a really hot leather jacket. PS: luv the baby idea, luv the interrogation scenes, hate the idea of Flack plus Collagen Lips. Eeeeeeeewwwwwww. And luv the fact that the only really hot women he ever sees are dead - otherwise it's just hairy middle-aged cops eating donuts and filing paperwork.
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